Jacqueline is a pirate, because her father is a pirate. In fact, everybody in her immediate family is a pirate. The only trouble is that Jackie actually wanted to be a high fashion model. She has the looks for it, but runways are few and far between in the 1700s. Besides, the whole “Jolly Roger” look is so 1600s…         

So, what's a girl to do? Leaning on a cannon, she works on her tan, and dreams of Paris haut couture, while her brothers plunder the high seas.

But won’t this damned bird SHUT UP, already? There weren’t any crackers back then!